After picking the winner of our Halloween costume contest, I was immediately brought back to freshman year of college. Our winner was dressed as a rainbow themed Unicorn… which of course made me think of Candy Mountain. You know – that ridiculous viral video about Charlie the Unicorn that made you feel like you were tripping on acid? Anyway, due to this flashback, I decided to dedicate an entire flashback Friday post to viral videos we used to love that we may have forgotten about now. Do you remember these?
Charlie the Unicorn: This video was pretty effed. These two unicorns with really high pitched voices wake up Charlie, who is sleeping in some random meadow. The two annoying unicorns wake up Charlie (this is when we hear Charlie’s deep manly voice) and take him on a journey to candy mountain, which Charlie believes does not exist. However, it does and at the end Charlie gets locked in candy mountain where his kidney is taken from him. I never understood this and I still don’t. However, this video has a Wikipedia page… and I have no idea why. So, maybe we can find out there?
My New Haircut: This video was about a guido who gets a new haircut, which just so happens to be a blowout. Surprise, surprise. Throughout the video, the guido – who is named ‘Broski’ – lifts weights, does jagerbombs, and tells us about his new haircut. It’s life changing. And most likely served as inspiration for Jersey Shore.
Flea Market Montgomery: This man sold literally everything at his flea market. The song/video goes on forever with Flea Market Montgomery telling us every item he sells at his flea market. I could watch it… forever… and I don’t know why. It’s like the song that never ends (lamb chop anyone?), but it’s outrageously addicting. ‘It’s just like… a mini mall!’
Can I Have Yo Number: ‘The back of yo head is ridica-lous.’ This video was just soo funny. It was first seen on Mad TV, but since no one ever watched Mad TV, this skit is more of a viral video. This number gave us the hilarious pick up line, ‘Can I have yo number…‘ and of course the immediate follow up question – ‘Can I have it?‘ The guy had huge eyes too, which basically made the video.
LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE: When Britney went into her cray cray phase, everyone lost hope for her except this guy. He just wanted everyone to leave her alone. He knew when they did, she would somehow reemerge as a normal person judging X Factor and shit.
I’m on a Boat: You may be thinking, ‘This video just came out,’ but – it didn’t. This video was released almost FOUR years ago. FOUR YEARS. Am I joking? No. Three years and nine months to be exact. Where did the time go?! Anyway, this SNL Digital Short made my life. I watched/listen to it on repeat for, like, over a year. I mean Akon was in it. The Lonely Island, although a faux rap band, are the only musical group that I can listen to and not get sick of (I Just Had Sex, Captain Jack Sparrow, Just Two Guys, etc). It’s weird, but I like it.
Dick in a Box: Another digital short that kind of paved the way for other Lonely Island digital shorts (i.e. I’m on a Boat). Justin Timberlake really made this video and showcased his comedic talents. He did it again during Mother Lover and then made an appearance in Jizz in my Pants (in the grocery store). I could honestly watch all of these videos and listen to the songs on repeat without getting sick of them. I think I need to have an affair with Andy Samberg – but that’s another story for another time. BUT REALLY (call me Andy!).
Bro Rape: As a young college freshman, this video was ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS to me. Natty ice, game cube, Dave Matthews… OMG, those are, like, so things a bro would like! True, very true. And where are you most likely to find a bro? A college campus, duh. We always thought bros were a little too close, and this video proved our assumptions to be correct. I wonder how many people didn’t join a frat because of this vid (or how many people did). And if you didn’t already know, the black guy from the video (Donald Glover) is kind of a big deal now. He’s now on Community and when not acting, he goes by the name of… dun dun dun… Childish Gambino! Who knew?
Shoes: Oh my god, shoes. This. video. was. my. life. Seriously. I loved this guy. He was kinda like Andy Dick (Daphne Aguileria if you will), which was awesome – and he loved SHOES. And who doesn’t love shoes? This video was the beginning of the betch era: aka an era in which betches rule the universe. It also inspired Andy Dick lookalike’s next video ‘Text Message Breakup.’ I mean, you can’t break up with someone via text. DUH.