Having a dog is like having a best friend who doesn’t judge what you eat or how often you shower. They are reliable, adorable and a source of pure entertainment. You love that little canine and have made your entire world revolve around him or her. You are starting to consider yourself as a crazy dog lady, but aren’t quite sure if you actually fit this classification. Here are some simple signs to help make the distinction.
1. You have completely unnecessary nicknames for your dog such as Pumpkin, Chicken Nugget, Baby Dog, Snooks, Captain Snuggles and other cheesy terms of endearment. Which by the way, your dog will come to as if it’s their actual name.
2. Despite your best attempt, your house is constantly covered in fur. Like more hair than the damn zoo. But what can you do? You’re a twenty-something with a dog, living in an apartment… it is literally confined to a tight space. And after all, a home with no fur is no home at all.
3. The dog hair that has made its way out of your home? You wear it as a second jacket. Fur on your clothing is inevitable. And you wear it with pride.
4. You don’t say the words “walk” or “potty” out loud. Nope, these terms must be quietly whispered or spelled out in order to verbalize. Using either of them will result in an overly excited pooch who will bug you until they go on a walk or out to potty.
5. A beautiful cookie jar is the chicest way to contain your dog’s favorite treats. They need to be handy… you obviously have them neatly displayed for your number one dog.
6. Eating while someone watches you? Please. You are the master at consuming food with puppy eyes glued to your mouth. The ability to eat no matter the distraction or amount of drool is a life skill.
7. Sleeping is a skill as well. You require very little space in your own bed and snooze smoothly through the night despite how loudly your little one snores.
8. You pick restaurants and bars based on their patio situation. Let’s face it, you make every decision based on their dog policy. You can’t expect me to do things without my favorite friend.
9. The photo stream on your phone is dedicated to your dog. It is a gallery, scratch that, a photographic exhibit to the life of your canine and other dogs you deem “cute”.
10. You had stationary made with your doggie’s picture, coupled with some cheesy saying to match. In my opinion, this is how you know you’ve reached “expert level” amongst the crazies. Cheers to you and welcome to the club!
P.S. – This is actually my stationary.
