It’s party season, and whether you’re planning for a fancy affair or an ugly sweater get-together, you’re bound to run into people you don’t know. And when your company is paying for the entire thing, you know it’s going to be a good time.
1. The Office Crush
You see them first thing in the morning as you walk over to your desk. Every time you lock eyes you melt and frantically text your work BFF of your daily love story. You two don’t exchange much conversation at the kitchenette while getting coffee, but every little interaction counts. Now’s the chance to dress to impress and chat up that hottie.
2. The Shy Co-worker
She probably sits near you, but doesn’t say much during the day. Since you don’t interact with her, you’ll find yourself asking what department she’s in and what account she works on. Once you see her out of her element, you find out she’s actually super nice and knows a lot more office dirt than you think.
3. The Chatty Cathy
This girl does NOT.STOP.TALKING. She’s always the one with the office dirt, who’s hooking up with whom, and enters into your conversation whenever she so pleases. She lingers on just a little too long, trying to find someone who will listen to her life story.
4. The Awkward Significant Other
He or she is just accompanying your co-worker, but handles the awkwardness by sipping a beer (or five). They will ask you where you are in the company, and the last thing you want to do is talk about work.
5. The CEO/President
Your CEO commands attention. When he walks into the room, all of the chatter stops. Chances are you’ve probably only met him once or twice since you got hired, but make sure to engage in a little small talk and say how amazing it is to be a part of the company.
6. The One Who Knows How To Bring The Party
He’s the one who heads straight to the dance floor upon arrival. He’s already pre-gamed the whole shindig, and he’s bound to have a good time. He’s the one who knows where the after, the after-after and the after-after-after parties are.
7. The Awkward IT Guy
He seems like a really nice guy, but the last time you tried to be nice to him and strike a conversation, he fell in love with you. Now, every time you see him, you awkwardly lock eyes. He always wants to chat, but you can’t even give him the time of day (especially not before 8am and before you’ve had at least two cups of coffee).
8. The Awkward IT Guy Who Knows How To Bust A Move
This could be #7 or #7’s friend. He’s just as awkward, but he shows he’s got serious dance moves, a la Napoleon Dynamite.
9. The Drunkie
This guy started drinking two hours before the party. He’s either 24 or 64, and always chats up the ladies. He’s calling all the shots (literally) and downing Fireball like it is water. He is definitely not coming into work the next day.
10. The Office Couple
Bet you never knew Alexa from Digital was dating Chris from Corporate and now they’re your office’s Jim and Pam.
11. The Newbie
Possibly an intern or someone who just started, they don’t know anyone to really “linger” around. They’re typically at the bar to calm their nerves, and either they’ll end up being the overdrinker, or the one who has a plan and needs to leave on a timetable.
12. The Social Media Addict
This girl is taking selfies upon selfies, and makes sure she tells everyone via Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat, Tumblr….and freaks out when she only has 10 likes.
In the words of Dave Matthews: “Eat, drink and be merry!”
