Your friend just handed you a gift with a card and asked you to be in her wedding, yasssssss!
Being a bridesmaid is a ton of fun, you get all of these occasions to get dolled up (which don’t happen very often anymore) and it’s a big honor to be a bridesmaid! However there’s a lot of pressure and nonsense that comes along with it. Here are some struggles every bridesmaid knows:
1. Helping the bride pick her dress – It’s not easy work listening to indecisiveness, enduring tears over weight, and trying to find a balance with sparing feelings but not allowing your friend to choose the wrong dress for the biggest day of her life.
2. Planning is basically as much of your life as it is the brides – Not only do I have to help with the wedding, I have to help with the bridal shower, bachelorette party, and arrange schedules with 4 other girls I actually can’t stand because we have to do things together. UGH.
3. Buying a bridesmaid dress – Yes, sure. YOU’RE getting married so let me spend MY money on a hideous dress of YOUR choice that I only get one use out of.
4. Buying shoes – How do you expect me to make it down the aisle in these?!
5. Throwing a bridal shower – Planning food, games, making invitations and sending them out to people I don’t even know, just so dis bish can get more gifts?!
6. Planning a bachelorette party – Now that the shower’s over we get to throw another party. But this one has to be crazy. And full of penises. And make sure the bride gets tanked. Challenge accepted.
7. Surviving the bachelorette party – Bride’s drunk, and we gotta take care of her. This is the night bridemaids can truly bond.
8. Buying gifts – Not only do I have to plan all of these parties, I have to buy gifts for them as well. And they have to be expensive gifts too, because we are guuuurrllllsss. *SIGH* I better get great gifts when it’s my wedding.
9. The “Not Being the Bride” meltdown – When is it going to be my turn?! All this work and it’s not even my wedding!
10. Preparing a toast – We’ve known each other for years so I’ve got to make this the BEST DAMN SPEECH EVER. I can’t leave anything out. Or should I leave those embarrassing moments out? Will she be mad? Would it make for a good laugh? I don’t want to ask her and ruin the surprise.
11. Making sure everything goes as planned – Even if I have to be the bridesmaid from Hell. If there’s a problem it is our royal duty as bridesmaids to make sure it is taken care of. Because those doofy groomsmen are too busy getting drunk before the wedding to take care of anything.
12. Taking care of the bride – This is HER day. Her looks must be accomplished before mine. And I have to give her all the pep talks she needs. If she needs anything (even help peeing), I’ve gotta do it. I’m her bitch for today. This is the true test of friendship.
13. Being social with people you don’t want to be social with.
14. Watching over the kids – Yeah fine, I’ll make sure they aren’t crying before they go down the aisle.
15. Taking a billion of ridiculous photos.
16. Looking fabulous – because, duh.
But on the bright side, there’s alcohol through all of this.
