23 Signs You Are Turning Into Your Mother

It was basically written in the sky. No matter how hard you tried NOT to end up like her (she was always so annoying telling you to be home by a certain time… or to clean up your room), you ARE her. And there’s no turning back now.

Here are 23 signs you are turning into your mother.

1. You have at least one glass of wine per day after/before/with/for dinner. And it may or may not get you a little tipsy.

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2. You often find yourself in bed watching TV with sweatpants on every night…

3. …said TV consisting of hour long network dramas that you DVR-ed last week and are just getting around to watching now. Downton Abbey? The Good Wife? Scandal? You’re on it.

4. You dedicate an entire day every weekend to grocery shopping. It’s not like you can just go to one store and be done. You must go them all. Every store has different items and different deals!

5. You buy underwear at Target instead of Victoria’s Secret. It’s cheaper, duh. And it’s not like you really care what you look like in lingerie anymore anyway. You’re either going to have your clothes on… or you’re going to be naked. It’s as simple as that.

6. When you yell at your significant other, you can actually hear your mom yelling at your dad. OH THE HORROR.

7. You are a discount-hunting-ninja. You collect coupons and you do NOT buy certain things unless they are on sale.

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8. You ask people to take off their shoes when they enter your home. Who do you think you are?!

9. You plan what you’re going to cook every week on Sunday. You need to know in advance so you can find all the best deals on this week’s ingredients.

10. If your steak isn’t cooked to your liking or your drink has too much vodka in it, you’ll send it back. Life is too short to pay for things you aren’t satisfied with.

11. Clutter gives you anxiety. You now understood why your mom always yelled at you to clean your room. You wouldn’t want to enter that thing now either.

12. You’ve cried while watching the Today Show. You have zero shame.

13. You would never keep something you’re never going to use. You keep basically every receipt and if you don’t use or wear said item in the next week, it’s going back! No more keeping clothes stuffed at the back of your closet with the tags still on them. You actually need that money!

14. You don’t understand why kids these days listen to noise. Ugh, dubstep? What even IS that? Haven’t they ever heard of Nsync or BSB? No? Okay.

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15. And crop tops? Gross. Who do these little girls think they are?

16. Home Goods is your happy place. A candle? Some potpourri? New pillows for the couch? Seasonal decor for the entry way? UGHHHH you can’t get enough of it. Bed Bath and Beyond is another place you <3.

17. You know what the difference between BJs and Costco is. They sell different things. And you have to go to both. Must buy the world in bulk. I mean, you can never have enough toilet paper… or pasta sauce… or pasta… or rice. Also, free samples. Everyone knows they’re better at Costco. Fact.

18. If someone asks you for something, you probably have it in your bag. You’re a modern day Mary Poppins. That thing is massive. No one ever knows what you’re going to pull out of it.

19. You buy (the majority of) your shoes based on practicality instead of how fashionable they are. For instance, even though those comfy flats are not as fashionable as a cute pair of heels, you will buy them over heels because heels hurt your feet… and you basically have no where to wear heels anymore anyway.

20. You no longer think any color is better than no color. Sunscreen has become your friend. Sadly, though, it’s probably too late to save your skin from wrinkles. Oh well. You will definitely school your kids in the importance of sunscreen one day!

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21. You actually care about people. When you drop someone off, you wait for them to go inside before pulling away. When someone leaves the bar or a party or even a dinner, you have them text you when they get home. If someone is upset, you’re always there to listen. You only do this for select people though. The rest you could give two fucks about.

22. NO ONE EVER HELPS YOU CLEAN!!!!! Or at least it feels that way. Why is there always something new to clean every 5 seconds? It never ends.

23. You’re often in bed by 10:30pm. You just get so tired now. Life is EXHAUSTING. Or maybe it’s the wine…

Samantha Matt

Hi I’m Sam. I made this website in 2011 and it’s still going. My first book, AVERAGE IS THE NEW AWESOME, is coming out in January (you can buy it right now on Amazon or from your fave bookstore!). I like pizza, French fries, barre, spin, more pizza, more French fries, and buying clothes. Writing is fun. Follow me on twitter & Instagram at @samanthamatt1... and on this site's meme account on IG at @20somethingproblems. OKAY GREAT THANKS BYE.

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