30 Signs You’re A Product of the 90s

 1. Your all time crush was JTT

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How cute was he? To be honest I remember his cute little smile in Home Improvement the most. The worst thing that ever happened to a 90s girl was hearing rumors he was gay? Did we ever find out if he was or not?

2. Your other all-time crush was Freddy Prinze Jr.

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Swoon, the ultimate 90s dreamboat. I totally wanted to be Laney Boggs. I’ll be honest, I still think his last name is Prince.

3. The Beets were your favorite animated band

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Killer Tofu!

4. You had a boatload of Milky Pens and Gelly Rolls

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These were absolutely crucial. I mean, what else were you going to write “I love” and your middle school crush’s initials with on the back of your hand? I used to beg my mom everyday to bring me to Staples so I could expand my collection.

5. You rocked these god awful sandals, proudly

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Steve Madden was definitely the shoe man of the 90s, even though he never designed a flattering shoe.

6. You always dreamed of getting slimed

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Ugh, lucky! I always wanted some unknown sludge to be squirted all over my face in front of a live studio audience.

7. Your first awkward sexual encounter was with one of these

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Who the hell created these creepy things? And why did we buy them?

8. You made your mom buy you this from Limited Too

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Most uncomfortable chair EVER!

9. Clarissa was your fashion icon

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Those tights though. On point, Sport.

 10. And how annoying was Ferguson? 

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Ugh, Ferg-breath.

11. You owned a Lisa Frank Trapper Keeper

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And matching pencils, pencil box, notebooks and folders. I’m surprised my mom actually bought me these acid-influenced, seizure causing things.

12. You drank Surge, even though it was disgusting

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Speaking of seizures..

13. You made your mom stand in line at Walmart on Black Friday for this creepy thing

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I don’t know about you but my tossed this sucker down the stairs. Looking back I should have just shut it off and taken the batteries out but I secretly enjoyed watching it break. What the hell’s wrong with me?

14. You are a pizza lover fo life!

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15. You were an avid collector of Pogs but had no idea how to play and still don’t 

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16. You wanted to be a Super Nova Girl 

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Zoom, Zoom, Zoom, you make my heart go, Boom, Boom, My Super Nova Girl.

17. You were never creeped out by this lady and her puppet 

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Or their messed up song.

This is the song that never ends, it just goes on and on, my friend. Some people started singing it, not knowing what it was. And they’ll continue singing it forever just because…

Sorry I’m not sorry.

18. You always dreamed of standing in front of this ancient talking head 

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19. You idolized these queens 

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Sporty, what’s going on with your hair, girl?

20. You played Crash Bandicoot

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21. You loved the Backstreet Boys or Nsync, but never both, at least not at the same time

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22. Tiger Beat was your everything

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23. The only drink that ever really quenched your thirst 

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24. You rocked a butterfly clip or two or ten 

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25. One of your favorite movie series 

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We’re super duper snoopers, first class private eyes.

26. This was the only Beetlejuice and Lydia you knew

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27. You thought Angelica was such a bitch

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and she was obsessed with cookies, dang.

28. These. 

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29. Every year your Christmas list consisted of one of these

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30. Your ultimate #wcw was no secret 

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Erin Jean

Erin Jean is a Boston based smart mouth who lives in suburbia with her kick-ass husband, yes you read that correctly, I'm a married woman, people! She graduated from Endicott College in 2010 with a degree in Contemporary Journalism. She loves tattoos, writing, and slush (it’s an addiction people). When she is not working for the man, she is riding on the back of motorcycles, online shopping, and reminiscing about her younger years. A typical week consists of watching too much Bad Girls Club, mentally preparing for a zombie apocalypse, and trying to get a body like Mila Kunis (please insert laughter here). Feel free to stalk her life via pictures @mrsbadnews13 or on twitter @erinlissa

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