1. You’re 22.
Okay Taylor we get it.
2. The girl in line behind you is buying the same bodycon dress as you except for her middle school dance this Friday.
3. You can’t find a single shirt that goes past your belly button…and you actually contemplated for a second whether you can pull off a crop top at work.
4. You’re older than the manager.
…because you’re OLD.
5. You realize you can’t pull off half of the things in the store, in fact, no one can – you were just delusional in college…and drunk.
6. When a co-worker asks you where you got your shirt – and you don’t want to sound like a tween – so you panic and say something like Nine West.
No ummm they have clothes in the back…..
7. More than 50% of the people in the store look like they should be casted on ALL THAT…and they have no concept of what All That even is.
8. And they give you dirty looks and actually make you feel insecure for like ten seconds.
9. You stop by after work and you’re the only person in there wearing business casual.
10. You’re not as broke as you were in college (sort of lol) so you nearly buy out the store every time you go.
11. Something resembling this happens when you try to wear a shirt for the second time after it goes through the wash once.
Oh is that why it was originally 12 dollars clearanced for 50 cents? WHY DID I GET THIS IN EVERY COLOR?
12. You have about 17 head on collisions with girls snapchatting while walking.
13. And by the 18th you’re ready to throw down.
But you don’t, because you’re like…an adult. So save your dignity, leave the three dollar maxi with a broken zipper behind and go to Express.