Well my friends… Sunday marks the 20th anniversary of “Clueless,” thus proving just how old we really are. In honor of this important and also horrifying milestone I have compiled the below list of signs you are actually Cher Horowitz because as we all know, is there really more to life than being Cher? (The answer is no)
1. You wear a watch for fashion, not to tell the time.
2. You don’t do knock-offs. You’re basically as real as it gets.
3. You have pretended to be into something, and have also genuinely convinced yourself that you’re into something, just because a guy you liked was into it.
4. You don’t actually know who Pippy Longstocking is. You’ve heard the name, but like… who is she and where did she come from?
5. Pretty much the only thing you remember from reading “Hamlet” is the name “Polonius.” BEST. NAME. EVER.
6. At some point in your life, you have expressed to others that you feel fat and then listed exactly what you ate that day in extreme detail even though you basically ate nothing.
7. Whenever you get to a party or bar, you always do a lap before committing to a location.
8. You have the worst gay-dar.
9. You have the highest of standards.
10. You tell people how it is.
11. Sometimes, life gets you down.
12. But you don’t let sadness get you down because you know how to get what you want. And so you do. Because you are CHER HOROWITZ and you are GOD.