As soon as you become an adult and start having real people problems like paying bills, adult breakups, and working long hours, you are able to look back at the things you worried about in high school and think ‘WOW, I wish those were my problems now.’ I actually used to get so upset over the dumbest shit back then and listen to ’emo’ music to make myself even more upset so I could become this pile of emotions in order to fit in because that’s what everyone else was doing.
Teenagers are literally so emotional. You could say it’s because of hormones, but I think it’s due to a lack of appreciation for life — and a lack of knowledge for what’s to come (re: student loan debt and the unaffordable cost that is living).
Here are 15 things that were pretty much the end of the world in high school that are “whatever” now:
1. Being grounded.
Being grounded meant you had to stay home, put on sweatpants, and chill the fuck out with no social interaction. This sounds like my ideal situation. Can someone ground me real quick for this weekend? THX.
2. Finding out people were talking sh*t about you behind your back.
This still sucks, but at least you now understand that any talk is good talk. People knew who you were and cared enough to talk about you. Anyone who wasted their time and energy talking about you was obviously 1. bored with their own life or 2. secretly in love with you (duh). Long live the days of rumors circling the halls. Now, no one cares about you enough to start a rumor. Oh well.
3. Not winning a game (or match or competition or tournament).
I remember crying after my last high school cheerleading competition… I just don’t remember why. Like, why did I care so much? No one knows.
4. When your parents told you you couldn’t hang out with certain people.
“BUT THEY ARE MY FRIEND,” you said! And who are they now? Probably a fuck up. Parents KNEW.
5. Fighting over who was in who’s limo for prom.
This shit was like The Hunger Games, but on crack. Some people were going to so-and-so’s house… other people were going to another so-and-so’s house. You didn’t know where to go, who to invite, or what to do. This was especially hard if you were going with someone in a different group of friends. Or if you didn’t have a defined “group of friends.” Then there was the whole “after-prom” thing, and if you didn’t have plans it was literally the end of the world. Then there was the whole “date” thing and the process of getting one of those was a horror story within itself. Oh the struggle of high school. It was real.
6. Not being able to figure out your locker combination.
Or not remembering where your locker is. I still have nightmares about this. It must have been reaaaaaal traumatizing. I honestly don’t even remember using a locker for the majority of high school. But I also don’t remember carrying books. I think I’ve blocked out 98% of high school (give and take two woods parties) and I’m okay with that.
7. Not “making varsity” or “getting captain.”
Wars were waged. Friendships were lost. Sports were life and also defined our social status. Andddd made us look good on our resumes for college. In the real world, no one cares about that shit. Like, who knew one day your varsity status would mean nothing? Sigh.
8. Getting to school late.
This was one of my biggest fears in life and I’m not sure why. Sure you got X number of tardies posted on your school record, but like who the fuck cares if you got your work done and got good grades? The other horrible thing about being late was securing a note from your parents if you knew you were going to be running late before you left home and trying to come up with a new excuse as to why you were late. For instance: I used to go in late whenever I had English class first period and had a paper due. Back then, I wasn’t too keen on being forced to write. Now, I write for fun (coming to you live from my bed rounding midnight on a Thursday… #clubgoinup). My mom would always write “appointment” on my notes. I went to a lot of appointments back then. The office people probably thought I went to therapy or something three times a week. This was embarrassing to me back then. Now, I just don’t give a fuck.
9. Not having any friends in your lunch.
At schools with rotating schedules, you never knew who was going to be in your lunch because it was different every day. So basically, if your friends weren’t in your lunch, you were screwed. Lunch was really awkward in general. You had to choose where to sit, who to sit with, and if you sat with a bunch of randoms, behold a very random conversation your entire lunch break.
10. Missing practice.
Or being late to practice. Literally, I remember one of my cheerleading coaches telling us that we could NOT miss practice unless we were on our death bed. Like, not a figurative death bed. A LITERAL death bed. And I mean literal in the most literal way. I would go to school with fevers of 101+ just so I could go to practice. The fuck, right?
11. Getting a bad grade on a test.
You panicked because it might hurt your GPA which could hurt your chances of getting into a good school and could also hurt your self-esteem if you had to bring the grade home to your parents because they would yell at you for failing. But again. WHO THE FUCK CARES? Not you anymore. Except about maybe one or two traumatizing grades. For example: one time I wrote this paper, then my mom edited it AKA she re-wrote it (because let’s be serious here people) and the teacher gave it a D+. The teacher gave my mom a D+. Lol. She’s probably still mad.
12. Getting busted by your parents for drinking.
Or by the cops. Or by the liquor store (the fuck were you doing with a fake ID in high school anyway?). Or by your school after they found pictures of you clinging on to a red solo cup online. If you were one of those unlucky folks, you probs got banned from #sports which actually was one of the worst things in the world (and still is) so sorry. But going back to the parents thing — OH WELL. You were just living and experimenting and figuring it all out. It’s not like your parents were angels when they were your age… or maybe they were… but regardless, the majority were probably experimenting in illegal things too… if not worse things. They were probably in high school in the 70s. That decade was nuts.
13. Not getting the class schedule you wanted.
YOU MEAN I DON’T HAVE STUDY EVERY DAY? THE FUCK!
14. Your crush finding out you like them.
The horror. THE HORROR. But now, this is actually the exact opposite. Let dem boys (or girls) know how you feel, and if they don’t feel the same way then move the F on. We all had that person – or those people – who we had hardcore secret crushes on… and sometimes said crushes found out and might have thought you were really, really creepy and weird, which unfortunately, you probably were. But whatever. Everyone was doing it. The problem was that everyone’s feelings weren’t mutual. BUT THAT IS LIFE. You just couldn’t accept the truths you were unintentionally learning.
15. Not getting into the college you wanted to go to.
Okay guys. Secrets out. I got rejected from the school I thought I wanted to go and then cried about it for a straight 24 hours. Then, I got into other colleges (that were just as good, if not better) and after a long battle of decision making (which was actually a very important battle), I made up my mind and never looked back. Everything happens for a reason. Like, thank GOD that school rejected me. I shouldn’t have even been upset about in the first place. They didn’t want me! On to the next one, ya freaks.
These things used to seem like the end of world to you, but now they seem pretty trivial right? Just think: One day you’ll probably laugh at the stuff you freak out about now… Like breaking up with your significant other at 27, or not knowing who to invite to your wedding, or not getting a job… right? I hope.