1. Moving to the Big City = $2,500/rent check

“Fuck it, I’m moving to Wichita

2. Failing to check the cost of utilities before moving into a new apartment = $600/whenever the oil company feels like showing up  

Oil heat is the fucking worst.

3. Getting a gym membership and never using it = $30-$70/month

4. Signing up for HBO = $30/month 

5. Maintaining a shitty car = $30/oil change + $25/state inspection + $50/month most basic insurance allowed by law + $1,500/repair

6. Going out to eat= $600/month

Last month, I spent almost as much on restaurants and takeout as I did on rent, utilities and insurance COMBINED. I’m such an asshole.

7. Forgetting to pack lunch = $15/week

8. Indulging in a mid-day pick-me-up = $18/week

9. Apartment booze = $30/month

What’s the point of living on your own if you don’t have a well-stocked liquor shelf?

10. Bar booze = $100/month

11. Shots = $30/night out

12. Leaving your tab open at the bar when you go out with your friends = $75/credit card

13. Getting drunk late night = $15/om nom nom

14. Enjoying a bottle of wine, attending wine related events, buying wine for other people = $40/month

15. Attending happy hour = $30/night entirely in $3 rail drinks and sliders

16. Buying decorations to make apartment less dorm-like = $30/month 

17. Buying shitty furniture that you’ll destroy after one party = $800/trip to Ikea

18. Overdrawing your checking account = $35/month 

19. Taking a cab = $20/trip

20. Buying literally hundreds of scarves = $60/season

21. Buying Halloween costumes = $50/Halloween

22. Buying clothing you’ll never wear = $40/trip to H&M 

23. Buying impractical shoes = $60/trip to DSW

 24. Buying fancy make up = $25/month

25. Visiting clearance sections and/or outlets = 10% off a $40 item you’d never otherwise buy 

This is such bullshit.

Write A Comment