1. Layering is a chore, but you’re used to it now because you’ve done it all winter so you don’t care how ridiculous you look
2. You rely on your laptop for instant heat
3. Seeing the words “Winter Storm Warning” written across the news weather segment makes you want to crawl into a hole and hibernate for the rest of your life
4. You contemplate buying a new coat not because it’s on sale, but because it’s still freezing
5. You have more “summer” clothes than “winter” clothes
6. When you see it’s sunny outside and you get wistful about wearing sundresses, but it’s actually a false alarm and not warm at all
7. When you have to apply lotion every 30 mins because of dry hands
8. Getting a cold…in March
9. You finally realize UGG boots are no match for snow.
10. CAN WE JUST FIX THE AIR IN THE OFFICE SO I’M NOT SWEATING/FREEZING THE WHOLE TIME?
11. You try to do everything in your power to avoid the snow, even if that means parking in a covered parking spot miles away from your destination
12. Winter sports are starting to get redundant and boring
13. Spring training photos make you cringe because even though it’s February in the Midwest/East, it’s sunny and 80 in Glendale
14. You cringe at anyone in a warm state who says “It’s so cold”, when it’s 40 degrees
15. You want to punch people in the face who post pictures of “winter” on the West Coast
16. Your extremities turn strange colors when they’re exposed to the cold
17. Sometimes you have to go to extremes to warm up (boiling water)
18. You want to stay in Hot Yoga studios and saunas allllll day and never leave
19. All of your rent money is doubled on heat and/or gas to heat up your car
20. When it’s warmer in Alaska than where you live
21. Your social life is practically non-existent because you’ve spent too many nights in and you’re desperate to go out
22. You question every day why you live in a place where winter takes up 8 out of the 12 months of the year
23. When Punxwantany Phil sees his shadow and you dream of punching him in the face because you know he’s a liar
24. The never-ending depression known as seasonal affective disorder (there’s a reason its initials are SAD)
25. Everything starts to become repetitive, from wearing the same six sweaters to the activities. You just want to drink on the rooftops, damnit!
26. Slush on shoes is your worst nightmare
27. Elsa may have said the cold never bothered her anyway, but eff that, now it’s just TOO. DAMN. COLD
28. You know your commute will be delayed, so what’s the point of even going to work?
29. You never want to get out of bed until the temperature is at least your age
30. You still get jealous when your teacher friends get “cold” days and you have to go to work
31. When you automatically hate anyone who tells you how many days there are til “spring”
32. Wait, scratch that, spring doesn’t exist
33. You start seeing clothing stores bring out their spring items and bathing suits, yet it’s still single digits so you have to wait 578039480239 days to wear them
34. 30 degrees is a heat wave
35. National Margarita Day is in the dead of winter, but National Tequila Day is in July
36. How many days until summer?
