Get a job (duh). If you have a job set up already, congrats. If not, apply like you’ve never applied before. And don’t be picky. We all need to start somewhere.

Clean your room at home. And I mean CLEAN. You’re a post-grad now… Don’t be a hoarder and keep useless papers from high school and random awards from youth sports teams. Throw. It. Out. And start now.

Get rid of old clothes… as in all your A&F polos, tiny Hollister skirts, cheap and out-of-style Forever 21 shirts, and any and every graphic T. Donate them or bring them to a consignment shop and try to make a profit.

Ditch your ‘student’ bank account and set up an ‘adult’ checking account along with a savings account. Once this is done, start saving if you haven’t been doing so already. This means not living paycheck to paycheck and not getting by on only graduation money. You will need the cash when you still don’t have a job in a few months (you might not) or when your parents suddenly kick you off the family plan and you have to start paying phone bills… and maybe even car bills (yes – this happens).

If you don’t have a job yet, try to get an internship or a part-time job until you get that full-time job offer. Time is better spent getting experience and/or making money rather than sitting on the couch watching Pretty Little Liars marathons (not that I did that).

Know your place. Sure, you just graduated college and got this awesome Bachelor’s degree that your parents want to spend like 100 dollars to frame… but it doesn’t mean you will be praised at your new job for your 4 year binge drinking journey. You’re once again the lowest of the low. You’re pretty much scum… or at least you will be when you start working. So before you even get that first job, know you’re just this young, little moron that doesn’t know a thing about the real world (secretly people will be jealous of your youth, but don’t let it show that you know – let them bask in their elder glory).


Hi I’m Sam. I made this website in 2011 and it’s still here! I'm the author of the humorous self-help book AVERAGE IS THE NEW AWESOME. I like pizza, French fries, barre, spin, more pizza, more French fries, and buying clothes. Follow me on twitter & Instagram at @samanthamatt1... and on this site's meme account on IG at @averagepeopleproblems. OKAY GREAT THANKS BYE.

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