To your mom, you will always be her baby. But babies grow up and become adults, so basically you are an adult baby. When you reach that point of adulthood, your mom starts being weird. It’s unavoidable. She’ll ask a lot of questions. She’ll make a lot of comments. But she’s your mom so you love her anyway.
She’ll ask about your relationship or lack thereof, and when you’re getting married. Regardless of how long your relationship has been, she has marriage on the brain. You are in your 20s, therefore you need to get married. If you are single, you need to find the right guy right away and get on the fast track to matrimony. Your mom will ask you how serious things are. If he’s “THE ONE.”
She’ll ask when you’re planning to have babies. Babies, plural. Moms want to be grandmas. They want you to get knocked up ASAP. They want to buy or make baby items. MOMS LOVE BABIES.
She’ll start discussing beauty products that have “anti-aging” in the title. Never too early to start an age defying skin regimen, according to Mom. Yes, I’ll start moisturizing before bed.
She’ll wear your clothes, or you’ll wear hers. It’s not weird anymore because chances are you’re not wearing low rise Hollister jeans and she’s not wearing the early 90s mom jeans. Since your mom is not like a regular mom, she’s a cool mom, you find joy in raiding her closet.
You’ll start sharing recipes or cooking tips. Because you’re an adult and you cook for yourself, damnit. You don’t need Kraft macaroni and cheese anymore. You talk about things like coconut oil and field greens.
She’ll comment on your Facebook photos and you won’t get mad or embarrassed about it. When you’re 18 years old the last thing you want is your mom commenting on that pic of you looking cute. Now you’re like, “thanks, Mom!”
She’ll ask when you’re coming home. Having an empty nest is probably rough. Mom wants to hang out with you. She’ll make you dinner and buy your favorite foods. You will do everything together. Then she’ll have a hard time saying bye when you have to leave.
She’ll start swearing in front of you. Back in the day, she didn’t call bitches “bitches.” They were “stupid people” or “dumbos.” Now it’s like F*$% this sh*t.
She can get you out of bed in the morning. When you were a teenager, she had to drag you out. But now, by some miracle, you wake up early and look forward to having coffee and breakfast with her.
Happy Mother’s Day, moms! Stay weird.
