Young couple celebrating with red wine at restaurant

1. He has ambitions, goals, and thinks about his future. A man is his late twenties/early thirties has a pretty solid idea of where is going and what he needs to do to get there. He knows whether he wants to commit to his current job to get a promotion or rethink his career path. He can make plans for the future whether that be the next month or the next year. He can confidently answer the question “where do you see yourself in 5 years?”

2.He knows what he likes and what he wants (and what he doesn’t). A guy who is a few years older than us isn’t trying everything out to see what he likes anymore. He knows what type of girl he wants to date, what type of company he wants to work for, and what he likes to do for fun. He knows he isn’t going to waste his time playing video games when he really wants to play flag football (or vice versa). And he knows the qualities he wants not only in a girlfriend, but in friends too.

3. He has a higher level of maturity. We all already know guys typically mature slower than girls. And we can’t ever say with certainty that a guy is 100% mature because even us girls have moments of immaturity. However, dating a guy who is a little older is more likely to be around the same maturity level as us. Being with a mature person equals a mature relationship. Mature guys give better advice, are better listeners, and truly care about our well being.

4.You two can do classy adult activities together. All activities are more fun when you do them with your significant other. Dating an older guy means that you get to go on classy adult dates with him. For example – group dinners. You can dress up and socialize with other people at the table while sitting next to your boyfriend with his hand lovingly placed on your knee. And no, this is not the same as going out to bars as a group…it’s just not.

5. He is past that immature “boy” humor. He doesn’t laugh when someone else says the word “fart” in public. But if you say when you two are alone, he might chuckle and that’s okay because we all need a laugh here and there. He doesn’t think it’s funny to make fun of other people. He doesn’t think it’s funny to point out your blemishes or your bad hair day.

6. He is more likely to be financially, mentally, and emotionally stable. He makes enough money to afford what he needs to buy (and doesn’t need his parents to help him out all the time). He knows how to budget his money so he can spend a little extra on vacations and birthday gifts. He isn’t crazy jealous, dependent, or needy. He understands when you need space or time. He is emotionally available and willing to put hard work into a relationship.

7. He is experienced. Yes, I mean sexually. A man with a few years more of life has had the time and opportunity to be with a few more women. He knows how to make a woman feel sexy and desired. He knows how to find out what a girl likes (and perhaps what she doesn’t like). And he isn’t selfish. He isn’t “doing it” just so he can get what he wants and needs. He is genuinely interested in giving us what we want.

8. He knows what you’re going through because he’s been there too. Our early and mid twenties are a wonderful time of trying to figure out what the heck we are going to do with our lives. An older guy has already been through that. He knows the struggles of looking for jobs, going to interviews, and not getting any offers. He knows how hard it is to move back in with your parents after living on your own for four years. He knows what it’s like to feel down and like you’re stuck. Since he’s been there, he knows how to comfort you and be there for you.

9. He has a focus/hobby besides work and video games. Any guy who has a passion for a hobby is sexy. It shows he cares about something other than what he has to care about (work, family, friends). Finding something he truly loves and wants to dedicate his free time to is satisfying and will make him happy. It helps make him a well rounded person with interests, desires, and passion.


Kristen Malm is a twenty-something year old Monmouth University graduate with a B.A. in English. After living on the Jersey Shore for 4 years, she is back home in CT looking for what to do next. She is obsessed with coffee, Gossip Girl, and brunch. She is also a seasonal (spring & summer) sushi and fro-yo addict. Kristen has joined in on the crossfit trend and may or may not become addicted…we will see (she probably will). Kristen enjoys history (it was her minor in college), traveling (she went to Ireland with high school classmates and England with college classmates), and watching MMA (there is just something about the anticipation of a person possibly getting knocked out…). She cares for her cat like its her child and loves listening to Spanish music even though 99% of the time she doesn't know what they are saying. Follow her on Instagram @kristenamalm !

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