We’ve all been there. Standing in line at the airport security just waiting to get through. For me, this is the worst part. If I could just skip over security I would fly everywhere I could. I would also need to be rich, so if someone wants to help me in that department, I am open to options.
Anyways, back to security being the worst thing in the world of travel. I understand it’s 100% needed to keep us safe and I am okay with that, but we need to teach people what to do before they go to stand in line. I can’t even begin to think of the time wasted in line because someone doesn’t know what the fuck to do. I mean it’s quite simple but apparently some people just don’t get it.
I had to leave out some thoughts off my list because they were just swear words, but I think we’ve all thought of one of the statements below while waiting to die.. I mean fly:
1. Is there a reason I got here so early?
2. Seriously though, security doesn’t open for an hour.
3. Wait, why is that person already in line?
4. Really need coffee to deal with these people right now.
5. Why do people rush to be first at security? No one wants to get felt up at this hour.
6. Can this person next to me stop yelling right now?
7. Also – stop standing so close to me.
8. I really need to get on that TSA Pre-Check ASAP.
9. I do know old people who move faster then these TSA people.
10. It’s 2016, do I really need to take my laptop out?
11. No, I’m not taking my little shampoo bottles out, there is no need.
12. SMELL THE LIQUID, IT’S WATER, WHY DO I HAVE TO THROW IT OUT.
13. TBH, I might vote for a candidate that makes TSA not so complicated.
14. OMG HAVE YOU EVER DONE THIS BEFORE?
15. How do I always get stuck behind first timers?
16. Wow, ok, please stop putting everything you own in the little tubs.
17. Nope, don’t need to take that out but you’re going to do it anyways.
18. Oh, ok, no, you don’t need to ask the TSA person what to do, they said it 475683902 times.
19. JUST TAKE YOUR SHOES OFF AND MOVE.
20. What in the world is this person bringing with them?
21. I’m 100% writing a book called “Airport Security for Dummies.”
22. I might turn out rich for that.
23. Oof, please shut your child up, it is TOO early for this.
24. How hard is it to put your bag on the belt and keep moving?
25. I might invest in a family to get through this faster.
26. Hands up, come on, you can do it.
27. This really isn’t that hard, wow.
28. Guys, really… what’s the hold up?
29. Walk, walk, just keep moving, don’t stop, I got places to be.
30. Yeah, I could definitely do a better job then the professionals at this.
31. Please stop dressing yourself at the end of the belt, that’s what those benches are for.
32. Lawd, please help me, these people are killing me slowly, *insert lots of cuss words*
33. WOO, I made it, now where is the booze?
Lets keep flying easy guys, don’t make this difficult!