Once upon a time, in a land far far away, people danced to music that didn’t only consist of lyrics about fucking bitches and getting money. Back then, people cared more about getting their dance on than getting laid. Clubs blared loud beats lacking auto tune and the ever-so-hip sound of dubstep. It was an innocent time. A time when ‘Everybody Dance Now’ and the ‘Cotton Eyed Joe’ were top 40 hits. A time when people took Jock Jams seriously and didn’t only listen to it when at a theme party. It was… the 90s.
Now, in a world where children sing rap songs about getting wasted and giving head on the playground, the above seems unimaginable. People couldn’t have seriously listened to such happy, upbeat music at the bar or in their car… right?
Wrong.
90’s dance music was the best music. It was fun. It was fast. And it made you want to run marathons on marathons on marathons. So you really want to get pumped up? Shut off the Skrillex, turn down the mashups, and turn up these classic 90’s dance hits. They might make you want to travel back in time to dance class and ‘go across the room’… and they might make you want to go to The Roxbury with Doug and Steve Butabi… but they will definitely make you want to get up and GO. Whether that GO be to the gym or the dance floor, you’ll be energized for days with just one hit of the following beats.
Here are the 10 best dance songs from the 90’s:
Mr. Vain – Culture Beat: Man/woman/whatever-you-are, person who sings this song, I love you. And your male rapping counterpart. This song IS the 90s because everyone was Mr. Vain. People loved to dance and not just stand around at sports bars like idiots. Every guy was semi-vain if not completely vain and they knew it. And weren’t afraid to rap it.
Be My Lover and Sweet Dreams – La Bouche: Both of these songs run together. Both have a fantastic build up. And both are sung by the deep voice of La Bouche. If you are ever bored or falling asleep these songs will get you going.
Tonight is the Night – Le Click: I always thought this song was by La Bouche, but it is actually by her evil twin sister, Le Click. I mean really… WHAT is with the artist names? This song will get your night going because it will make you feel like things are going down tonight. Like tonight will the best night EVER. Just because Le Click said so.
Jellyhead – Crush: Whenever I hear this song, I feel like I’m right back in dance class doing kicks across the room. I literally want to do kicks across whatever room I’m in when I hear this song, but I hold myself back. Except when drunk. Do not play this song around me when I am drunk. I will do kicks. And turns. And I will probably hurt myself.
Beautiful Life – Ace of Base: What a great message, Ace of Base. I knew I always liked you. I have Zumba-ed to this song and it was literally the happiest thing I’ve ever done. I could have danced for hours. I also used to run to this song. Again, for hours. If you’re ever sad, this song will cheer you right back up because, well, it’s a beautiful life. Didn’t you know?
More and More – Captain Hollywood: One day while downloading various Jock Jams hits, I came across this song which I for some reason didn’t have in my iTunes lib already. I obv downloaded it and have been using it as gym motivation for months. More and more and more and more and more and more. Legit this song makes me keep doing whatever I’m doing when listening to it. Also, Captain Hollywood? Is that a serious name?
Ooh Ahh Just A Little Bit – Gina G: What ever happened to Gina G? She came out with this and then went away. I loved this song and still do. Even though I am pretty sure the lyrics are about sex – they do not actually state that – so it’s fine I used to sing this song while jumping up and down at age 7… right?
Good Vibrations – Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh don’t even get me started on this one. Mark Wahlberg take yo shirt off. Please. At the mere age of 3, I was listening to this classic with my dad dancing around my living room. Not even kidding – There’s a video. I used to think it was weird that my dad listened to this music. But then I realized he was in his twenties when it came out. And then I began to wonder what my kids will think when I’m listening to Kanye West and Avicii. But really.
This Is Your Night – Amber: This song makes me want to stand up and bob my head to the side for a solid 10 minutes. The beat keeps going and going and going. This is a fantastic song to listen to while getting ready in the mirror. You will honestly believe THIS IS YOUR NIGHT once the song is through and you will leave your abode thinking you look better than you do. Oh and if you want to head bob in a corner once you get TO the club, this is your jam (get it?). And we can’t forget – Amber came back a few years after with… Sexual. Do you remember it? La di da di de de da de… or something – I don’t know. But it definitely wasn’t as good. And it was awkwardly played during middle school dances. Soda break anyone?
Another Night – Real McCoy: Another Night is and was one of my favorite songs. The only problem is… it is a lot like ‘This Is Your Night.’ They kind of, like, sound the same. They could be put in a mashup and I wouldn’t think it was a mashup. Well, I would know… but you probably wouldn’t. Anyway, the best part of this song is the rap break. Talk about 90s. We need more of that kind of heavy breathing seductive rap that makes you want to sweat on the treadmill rather than sweat in a crowded club in large hoop hearings and stilettos.
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