When I was in elementary school, I had no idea about all the different people I was going to meet in middle school… and when I was in middle school, I didn’t think I would be making any new friends in high school – since I already knew everyone. We all thought that… but how many times did you switch up your friends? A lot I bet. Of course, there are always those few people that stick around after all those years – but not everyone has them AND even if you do, it doesn’t mean a new bff or two can’t come along.
When I left for college, my friends and I cried and cried and cried… and cried. On my drive to Ithaca, I sat in the car and cried some more for the whole six hour drive. I already had my friends – who needed more? Well, I “surprisingly” made tons of friends at school… Of course, those friends constantly changed until I figured out the people who I would actually keep in touch with after college – as everyone soon does. Basically, what I am trying to say is that friends are constantly changing – whether you are starting college and being force fed acquaintances or if you are on a vacation trying to relax and get away… New friends are everywhere. Literally.
So what happens after college? You are no longer going to be in an environment where “breaking the ice” games are encouraged and friends have to be made. You have your college friends… and if you’re lucky like me – you have your high school friends. Who needs more? Well what if you move to a new city? What if you and your friends live in different places? What if you all work different schedules? Are you freaking out that you will have no one to hang out with? And if you’re single, are you freaking out that you may NEVER meet a guy ever again? Well stop freaking out because your life really is just beginning! And just like your friends changed through grade school, your friends are going to keep changing (or keep growing) forever!
Friends of Friends (of friends): One of the best ways to make friends… is through friends. Even through significant others and their friends! If you’re living at home and not surrounded by college friends anymore, you are most likely hanging out with your friends from high school. Since your HS friends also went to college, they have college friends too. There is no need to separate college & home friends, so now basically everyone who lives in the same area will hang out. It goes the same for living in a new city… If you have a friend who is from your new city, you are going to be introduced to all of their friends… and then their friends’ friends… The list goes on. I can not even begin to tell you the amount of friends I have made through other friends since last May when I graduated. Whether it’s hanging out with my best friend’s college friend or hanging out with my college friend’s home friend – I am still meeting people left and right. Instead of my group of my friends at home getting smaller, our group is growing because of all these new additions! And I love it.
New College Friends: Because you already graduated, you probably think you have your friends who went to college with you and you’ll never be friends with any more alumni. Well, that’s not the case. I became friends with a few people I was not friends with in college because they live in the same city as me… and we have something in common – our college town! I’m sure you weren’t able to really get to know everyone you went to college with, so if they’re around you, contact them! Most of us are friendly people hoping to make a new friend, so don’t be afraid to reach out to a fellow alumni in your area. It’s kind of like networking, except you can get drunk with these people and not be all professional all the time. This is a great way to meet people, especially if you moved away from home and don’t really know anymore. Us Ithaca alumni stick together – and I hope your college alum’s do too because it’s a great way to make both personal and professional friends.
Work Friends: This is a given. Since you are starting a new job, you are going to inevitably meet more people… However, depending on the environment of your work place, making friends might not be in the cards for you. You just graduated and are in your early 20s, constantly wanting to rage, all the time. SO, you are prob not going to want to hang out with married people, people with kids, people who are getting to the point of being married & having kids, or young people who are not interested in blacking out anymore (ughhh, they’re missing out). If you are lucky and have people your age at work, go out with them. Facebook them. Get their numbers. Go out for drinks after work. Yeah, you can still separate work from your personal life with all of your other old and new friends… but why not see if there’s anyone at work who you would actually keep in touch with after you get a new job. I know people who are now rooming with work friends. You never know!
If you have any other ways you have made new friends since graduation, please let me know and I will add it to the list 🙂
3 Comments
Join a club – I joined the General Federation of Women’s Club, Junior edition. it’s for women aged 18-35. monthly meetings, community service. for someone who moved to a new city without knowing anyone, it’s a huge help! I’ve met and become friends with a ton of people.
Also, really love your blog!! 🙂
Thank you Liz! And that is a great way to meet people – I will definitely add something about joining clubs and/or sports teams 🙂
Great. Here is one way you can add to your list : Meetup!
I actually made a 9-page report about it, you can find it here (How to Get 3 Friends in 3 Weeks):
http://socialcirclepower.com/free-download-get-3-new-friends-in-3-weeks/
See you there
-Paul