Your fridge is full of save-the-dates and soon those dates will be upon you and being single – you’re fucking dreading them. But before you start popping the anti-anxiety meds and trying to find a random date to attend your friend or family’s latest nuptials – take a breath and check yourself before you wreck yourself – here are some helpful tips.
Alcohol in Moderation
I know alcohol usually can help solve all 20something problems and unfortunately/fortunately an event such as a wedding is no different. My only advice is to pace yourself because as much as it really does suck being the single girl which if I must say in all honestly – no one will remember that you came alone five years later – but they will remember the DRUNK girl that ended up dry humping the ice sculpture. Keep it classy, not trashy.
Deflect THAT question
Nails on a chalkboard. It honestly makes me want to dry heave or punch a small child – YES I am single. NO I am not seeing anyone that I want to tell you about random family friend. I DON’T KNOW WHY I AM SINGLE. Y’all should embrace the fact that this question is going to be asked by someone but instead of snapping their head off and then crying in the bathroom – guide the conversation in another direction. “No I’m not currently seeing anyone right now because I just got a huge promotion I was up for at my job.” “Yeah it’s just me for right now because I find I get to have a lot more spontaneous fun with my friends while I still have time. Do you want to tell me how boring your life is now?” Done and done. Moving on.
Treat Yourself
Carrie Bradshaw said it best – if you don’t get married or pregnant and you spend countless dollars celebrating friends that do – why should you miss out on celebrating you? Through the monotony of wedding shower and buying crockpots and blenders galore – treat yourself to an item. You have been eyeing that NutriBullet for weeks — do a little swipe-swipe because YOU DESERVE IT. Also treat yourself to a new dress or shoes for the wedding so that the bride isn’t the only one glowing that day. Just because it’s not YOUR wedding doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t celebrate how badass you are on your own two feet.
Do Your Guest List Research
There is no harm is stalking the other single guests – trust me, there will be at least one and you will probably be sitting with them at the dreaded “singles table,” but misery loves company, right?
The Power of No
If that destination wedding in Mexico is causing you a panic attack since it will be a romantic vacation for all attending – then don’t go. A wedding is supposed to be a fun and care-free time to celebrate your friendship or family bonds with someone and it should be CELEBRATED and not something you dread facing with a single marital status. Don’t put the pressure on yourself – if you aren’t in the right head space—you CAN say no. And if your friend is a real friend, they will understand. And if they don’t well…they suck cause they are getting married, right?
+1 -1 Equals Awesome
I must remind all you single bitches that y’all rock. Wedding season can be the harshest reminder of the life that you don’t have. But just because you don’t have that now doesn’t mean that that life isn’t on the horizon on you. For most of us, your twenties are supposed to be about finding out who you are out of your post-college-drunken haze. So there is nothing wrong with taking the time to be selfish in your career or dreams or any aspect of your life. So swallow your cynism for the night—along with a killer cocktail—put on a good face—because you won’t be single forever.
