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The Bachelor Breakdown: Lick, Shoot, Suck

  • Every time it’s cold, I remind myself that I went to Ithaca College and used to go out in the freezing cold wearing stupid little forever 21 dresses with tights that did absolutely nothing. It will be fine!! But then I wonder if temperatures actually feel different when you’re in your early 20s??????? Because they must. It’s the only logical explanation. None of that “drinking makes you warm” bullshit. There are not enough espresso martinis in the world that would make me feel comfortable outside in NEGATIVE TEMPERATURES. Early 20s me was built different, that’s for sure
  • I have a problem. Also why are there no homes for sale right now
  • All you really need is one tiny victory to have a productive weekend so please excuse me while I spent the rest of my time doing absolutely nothing 💅
  • Nothing makes me feel older than remembering I had to take a required class in middle school where they taught us how to type on a computer keyboard as if we didn’t spend all our time after school on AIM. Also, flip phones didn’t even exist at this point, and now they’re “BACK” (see our reel from yesterday for proof). Did box computers with disconnected keyboards miss their time for a comeback idk
  • How long until BBM is back? (OG vid: @skzzolo)
  • This tweet will never get old will it
  • Not dramatic though

@averagepeopleproblems

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