You know who Raffi is.

Salem to you isn’t a town. It’s a cat.

You had a Furby, and you brought it to school so it could converse with other Furbies.

The first guy who admitted to liking you was not a real person. He was a guy from Dream Phone.

What happened to those guys?

The poop emoji eerily reminds you off the poop tamagotchi’s made.

Teenie Beanie Babies caused a whole lot of weight gain in your younger years…

As did Monopoly…

And these guys…

Effing McDonalds… Do people even eat fast food anymore?

You still don’t understand why your mom made you keep the Princess Diana beanie baby in a glass case… Or you just don’t want to understand because… how much did that thing cost? was the Facebook equivalent in elementary school.

…Because setting them up on your bed wasn’t time consuming enough…

And Dear Diary was the blogging equivalent…

But before technology was that advanced, you used a real live diary!

This book means something to you.

If someone asked you to make a fortune teller right now, you could do it in less than 10 seconds.

You used to try to fit all of those in your mouth at once.

You do a mean Macarena.

To you, there is no Mary Kate Olsen and Ashley Olsen. There is only Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen. They are one.

Mario Kart was and is a way of life.

As were Diddy Kong and Pokémon Snap… but I won’t get into that.

You got a lot of vital information from Lori Beth Denberg.

You remember when Amanda Bynes first appeared on All That.

You also remember playing MASH, but your life now is nothing like it said it would be…

And, of course, the song that never ends will always be the most annoying song ever.

I’m pretty sure it ended though… 


Hi I’m Sam. I made this website in 2011 and it’s still here! I'm the author of the humorous self-help book AVERAGE IS THE NEW AWESOME. I like pizza, French fries, barre, spin, more pizza, more French fries, and buying clothes. Follow me on twitter & Instagram at @samanthamatt1... and on this site's meme account on IG at @averagepeopleproblems. OKAY GREAT THANKS BYE.

1 Comment

  1. As soon I scrolled to “the care and keeping of you” I screamed. I’m pretty sure that’s somewhere in the depths of my closet still.

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