I’ve been engaged for a little over two months now and I have to say – planning a wedding is actually one of the weirdest experiences I’ve ever gone through. I guess I can’t say I’ve ‘gone through’ this experience yet – I haven’t even picked a venue. But the research and time that has gone into attempting to pick a venue so far has been real. Or maybe I’m just the most indecisive person the planet. That could be the problem here.
So far, in only two months, I’ve experienced a lot of #feels. Possibly more feelings than the girl who had a lot of feelings that didn’t even go to North Shore High School. Actually, that has just been my menstrual cycle. Just kidding. Or not?
Here are 11 feels I think most people who are getting ready to plan a wedding feel. It’s an overwhelming group of feels, but getting married is supposed to be emotional, so it’s good to know I am, like, a real person with a heart who feels feelings.
1. Happy that someone wants to spend the rest of their life with you.
Congratulations. You just won the game of dating. You met someone, they occasionally paid for you to eat food, you annoyed them, and then for some reason, they decided they wanted to spent the rest of their life with you. Go you.
2. Sad when everyone stops congratulating you.
After the celebratory drinks and the ‘congratulations’ from everyone stop, it’s back to real life. You go from a super high (the engagement) to a regular life. But TBH, your life isn’t ‘regular’ anymore. You have to temporarily call your significant other a French word, and you have to plan a wedding. So now, you’re depressed, you have a ton of shit to do, and no one really cares. Great.
3. Overwhelmed with sh*t to do.
After you get engaged, you’re supposed to plan a wedding while working a full-time job and living a full-time life. But wedding planning is a full-time job! How are you supposed to make time for wedding planning without half-assing it and/or ignoring every other aspect of your life? Is it possible? Y/N? Because I say no.
4. Poor x10000000000.
I promise, you will never feel more poor than you will feel when planning a wedding, unless you have unlimited funds growing on trees in your backyard of course. Weddings are so expensive that I bet even celebrities have to budget. I mean, the Royal Wedding was $34 million. Khloe and Lamar definitely had to set a budget to not go over $1 million.
5. Confused as to whether you should continue to celebrate or start #sheddingforthewedding.
This is supposed to be a *happy time.* You’re supposed to be celebrating and enjoying yourself. But how are you supposed to be HAPPY and celebrate if you have to work out all the time, halt drinking, and eat only one piece of kale per day? Sure, you can go out to restaurants and ‘make smart choices,’ but if we’re being serious, smart choices are not fun. A life without pizza and wine is not a happy life, so if I’m supposed to be happy, how do you suppose I make those things happen while dieting? I guess I could buy clothes (another key to happiness), but I can’t because I am (#4) poor.
6. Heartbroken when you realize you can’t afford the type of wedding you always wanted.
Damn you Pinterest for making people everywhere dream up weddings they will never be able to afford – or at least not want to spend all their money on, even if they can afford it. I actually modeled my dream wedding after Julie’s and Caleb’s wedding on The OC. This was unintentional, and I did not realize I was trying to make this wedding happen for my wedding until I started planning a wedding. Problem 1 is that I don’t live in California, and problem 2 is that this weddings was on TV – and was planned by billionaires. What is wrong with me?
7. Even more heartbroken when you find out the ‘good’ dates are taken when you find a wedding venue you actually like.
All you can do is settle, wait, or continue to spend countless hours researching, emailing people, and scheduling tours. HOW DEPRESSING IS THAT?!
8. Under pressure to make really big decisions in a short amount of time.
Planning a wedding is a lot like looking for an apartment. When you find something good on the market, you have to grab it immediately or it will be gone. Weddings are a little more expensive though. You can’t just move your wedding it doesn’t work out. The venue isn’t the only decision either. Everything is a decision. The flowers, the dress, the bridesmaids, the silverware. Like, it’s a bit MUCH for the world’s most indecisive person (me), so please excuse me if I go into hiding for a few years.
9. Really anxious to get married.
Most people think after you get engaged, you can plan your wedding to be in the next year or year and a half (or 8 months if you’re ballsy), but there are so many factors that determine when you will get married. I mean, sure, you can plan your wedding around a date and take whatever and whoever is available on that date – but if you’re planning around a place and entertainment and a photographer and a season, it won’t be easy to find a date that works for everyone that you’re down with too.
10. Really nervous to get married.
Maybe you have a fear of being in the spotlight. Maybe you have a fear of public speaking. Maybe you have a fear that it will rain, or a fear that it won’t go as you planned in general. Maybe you’ll start having nightmares – maybe you’ll avoid planning to avoid nightmares. No matter what, marriage is scary – but not, like, the ‘getting married’ part… The actual ‘wedding’ part is what is really scary.
11. In love.
Despite the moodiness, the anxiety, and the overwhelming responsibility that is planning, you will feel in love – and not just with your ‘fiancé’ (ugh), but with your friends, family, and life. Wedding planning is definitely weird, but it’s an experience. And in the end, you won’t remember the craziness or the arguments that happened during the planning – okay, actually, you probably will… but what you will remember most is the ~love~ that was all around you during the entire process. Yay.