Way back in the stone ages of 2011, I made a WordPress site while bored at work (Spoiler Alert: It’s the website you’re on right now). Sitting in my cubicle with nothing to do, I messaged back and forth with a friend asking what she thought of different blog titles. We came to the consensus that ‘Forever Twenty Somethings’ was perfect, because at that point in our carefree lives, we felt like we’d be in our twenties forever. Turning 30 was light-years away.
I spent the entirety of my 20s running, growing, and eventually neglecting this website. Throughout it all, people always echoed the same question to me time and time again: “what are you going to do when you turn thirty?”
I would always respond, “The website is not about literally being in your twenties forever. It’s about feeling young. Age is just a number. This site is for everyone.”
I repeated the above so many times, I eventually started to believe it. However, I didn’t fully buy what I was selling. Inside, I panicked about one day turning 30. So much so that I stressed myself out to the point of no return about everything. I had built an entire personal brand around being a twenty something. Like everyone else, I wondered would happen to me when I wasn’t in my twenties anymore?
Your 20s Are Full of Unnecessary Pressure & Comparisons
Like every other 20-something out there, I felt I needed to accomplish so much stuff before turning 30. This led me to be way too hard on myself in my 20s. I was always trying to do too much at once—save, spend, write, work, relax, party, diet, eat, work out, clean, shop, travel, spend time with friends, the list goes on. Even though I was doing the most, I never felt like I was doing enough because I didn’t give myself time to be fully immersed in any one single thing. I didn’t give myself time to stop and look at all that I had accomplished. I didn’t give myself room to breathe and smile at all the positivity I was surrounded by in my every day life.
Despite everything I had accomplished in my twenties, I never felt like I was enough. Even when I eventually achieved my dream of getting a book deal based on this website, I felt behind. I was set to become an author in my 30s, but I wasn’t ending my 20s as this successful author with boat loads of money. Nothing was ever enough.
For some reason, I thought that nothing I did after turning thirty would matter and that no one would care. I was under the impression that you could only take risks, make changes, and achieve wild success in your twenties. After that, risk-taking would be too risky. Making changes would be too complicated. I thought if I was going to make it big, I’d have to make it big in my twenties.
What I Realized As I Turned 30
As I REALLY neared thirty, things changed. Between the stress of planning a wedding, selling and working on a book, working my full-time job, traveling, and trying to maintain a social life, I realized that even though I technically could do everything (with little-to-no sleep), I didn’t NEED to do everything. If I wanted to, I could stop, breathe, and enjoy life.
I didn’t need to spend every second of my free time on side gigs. I didn’t need to go out every weekend. I wasn’t up against a clock—there was no race. After coming to terms with all of this and slowing my life down, I began to see just how much I had accomplished in my twenties. I noticed I had been taking my relationships with other people for granted and not valuing our time spent together as much as I should have. I traveled to Europe and, for the first time since probably third grade, did not go on my computer for two weeks. Instead of worrying about what I had to do, I focused on what I was doing in the moment and started to appreciate the beauty and love around me. Life felt good.
I think I was completely right about ‘Forever Twenty Somethings’ being a state of mind where one feels young and carefree. But because I was too panicked about not accomplishing enough before turning thirty to feel young and carefree during my twenties, I didn’t truly feel like a ‘Forever Twenty Something’ until I was about to turn thirty. And even though I am now deep into my 30s, I still feel this way.
The Best Things About Life After Turning 30
When I turned 30, I figured I would feel sad and old and settled, but I didn’t feel any of those things. My life was different and I had developed new interests. I didn’t drink like I used to, and I didn’t feel the urge to party like I used to, but I still had the same basic wants, needs, and life goals. After realizing all of this, I was finally in on the secret: 30-somethings are living the good life.
Here are the 4 biggest reasons why life gets better in your 30s:
You might still feel young, but you’ll be wiser than before—It’s the best of both worlds!
You’ll care about the important stuff, and you’ll give zero fucks about the rest.
You’ll be very busy, but you’ll know when to slow down, say no, and enjoy life.
You’ll still have dreams, but you’ll know there’s no expiration date on going after them.
In my heart and in my mind, I will forever be that twenty something girl hustling every day to achieve her dreams—no matter what. And now that I’ve finally learned there’s no rush, I can continue being that person—just a less stressed version who takes time to enjoy life and have fun. After all, I’m a Forever Twenty Something.